Jeremy Stephens Considered Suicide Following Loss to Jose Aldo at UFC on Fox 30

There’s no shame in losing to the man regarded by many as the greatest featherweight of all time, but Jeremy Stephens’ technical knockout defeat to Jose Aldo this past July affected him deeply.

The setback had Stephens examining why he was “failing at my biggest moments.” Entering UFC on Fox 30, “Lil Heathen” was on a three-fight winning streak and could have moved into title contention with a victory over a former champion.

"After the fight, I was looking at my kids who were 9 and 7, and that was when my parents split up, when I was 8 years old," Stephens said on Ariel Helwani’s MMA Show. "I was ready to leave my wife, leave my kids and just leave it all. Thinking suicidal thoughts.”

The 32-year-old Stephens is one of the promotion’s most tenured competitors, with a 15-14 Octagon record dating back to 2007. The Alliance MMA product has never fought for a title in the UFC, however.

"I didn't really believe in myself," Stephens said. "Why should a young kid from Des Moines, Iowa, be a world champion? Right as I was about to get my title break, I would just drop the ball. There was no self-confidence. Those things were holding me back.”

Stephens admitted to having similar dark thoughts growing up as his parents separated and he attended 14 different elementary schools. Before he become one of the sport’s most feared knockout artists, he was bullied in high school.

After his loss to Aldo put him in a bad place mentally, Alliance MMA coach Eric Del Fierro recommended that Stephens attend leadership classes at “Choice Center” in Las Vegas. The course has made a difference.

"Little did I know, once I got in this program, all I had to do was change my mindset," Stephens said. "Find some tools, discover a little bit more about myself. Share these things with people so that they can see where I come from and I can also learn from their life experiences.

"People look at us as fighters, and yes, I'm probably one of the toughest dudes you'll ever meet, but I've also been down in the dumps. I'm a real human being. I'm a person, I have feelings, I have emotions. Going through this program has really put me on another level mentally. It's helped my family. I've seen how it's affected my relationships and opened me up to a whole new world.”

Stephens will return to action on Saturday against highly-touted featherweight prospect Zabit Magomedsharipov at UFC 235 in Las Vegas. The bout will be televised on the ESPN portion of the preliminary card prior to the pay-per-view.